Faith, Reflections

My Anniversary

It’s hard to believe that one year ago today, I had a large tumor removed from my leg. I had no idea then what the next several months would bring. What started out as routine, ended up being more extensive than I could have imagined. It took months to heal and even though the internal healing is complete, I will have a scar to remind me for the remainder of my days of the lessons that I needed to learn.

In those weeks, I learned how to accept and appreciate support from others, but also disappointment. The very people that I thought would have come to my side at a very vulnerable time in my life, did not. And the very people, who had no reason to, did.

That is the funny thing about loss, no matter what it is, surgery or death. Love and support comes from the most unexpected places to fill your cup. They are those angels that come and minister to you without saying a word. They just flutter about doing, because they know that you would never ask.

Behind the scenes they make sure that you are fed and comforted. They make arrangements for your beloved children. They send cards, they call. They ask about you. Sometimes they just sit and listen to you go on and on without judgement. And sometimes, they catch you before you hit the floor.

Were it not for the angels near and far, that chose to love on me when my pride would not permit me to ask for help, though, I very much needed it, I would not have fared as well as I did; my heart is grateful. I am grateful that they ignored my foolishness and did the work that needed to be done.

“Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for thereby some have entertained angels unawares.” Hebrews 13:2

In Christian love,

AngelaChristine

One year post my surgery
Faith, Love, Reflections

Without You

Who would I be without You? Without You, my life would be a heap of ashes, without a hope and without a future. Without You, I would barely be hanging on. Without You, my words would have no meaning, my life a waste. Without you, I would be unsaved and destined for damnation. Without You, I’d never know that love is patient and is kind.

I pray that I will never forget, Who you are and all you have done for me; because I never want to live this life without You.

“With my whole heart I seek you; let me not wander from your commandments!” Psalm 119:10

In Christ alone,

AngelaChristine

View during walk after dinner

Faith, Family, Reflections

Why Isn’t He Enough?

When my life doesn’t reflect Jesus Christ, I have to ask myself why isn’t he enough? I am sure that most Christians have asked themselves that question at some point on their journey too; so in that respect I am not alone. But why? What keeps us from full devotion and commitment, when Jesus has given us salvation through the shedding of his blood. How do we look at the Messiah, who bore all the sins of the world on the cross and still think or act like he is not enough?

Obviously, I know that he is more than enough, that he is perfect and divine. A light so bright that the world could not contain him. But when I sit down at the end of day and question whether my life truly reflects him, what I see, at times is not his reflection but my own.

It is not easy being a single parent, let alone the single parent of a child with special needs. While also trying to parent a child who just wants to live a typical pre-teen life but can’t much of the time because of how much she has to help me. I think often of how different my children’s lives are than my own upbringing. I was raised with both my parents in a solidly Christian home, yet somehow that is not the life that I have managed to provide to my children. I ask the Lord daily to help me, to guide me to do all the things that I am required to do. But I have to admit, there are times that I am inadequate and fall short.

I know, I can never be perfect, but I can be complete through total surrender to the will of Christ. It is that space between my will and his will where I challenge him and make him not enough. I wrestle with submission, not that I know better or that I can do better, but that I haven’t learned to trust. You see, I am the one that will not leave my burdens on him, because in my mind, I should have to live with the consequences of my choices. That’s right, my choices, that were most likely not rooted in him.

I am grateful for a Savior who forgives and redeems and knows in my heart, that I love him. As a wild horse has to be broken in to be ridden, it is my prayer that from this day and for as many days as I have left, that I will finally surrender my all and make him enough.

The Bible says, “Let is hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for he who promised is faithful.” Hebrews 10:23

In Christian love,

AngelaChristine

Belief, Faith, Mindset, Reflections

Another Hurdle

You know that one word, that most of us dread? Well, I got to hear it today. Turns out the lump on my leg is a rare type of cancer.

Well, I guess I can add it to my list of two broken bones, a concussion, two C-sections, autoimmunity and now cancer. But you know what I’ll never add to my list? Defeated, downtrodden or victim.

I am victorious in Christ Jesus, and just like every other challenge I’ve had to face, I will face this one with the King of Kings, Lord of Lords, the almighty Jehovah.

With gratitude,
AngelaChristine

American, Belief, Faith, Family, Freedom, Love, Mindset, Reflections

My Hope for America

This morning before I started my Bible study, I started to think about where we are as a nation and my heart began to grieve. I thought to myself, how can I say that I love God, with all heart and all my soul and hate my neighbor. Please don’t misunderstand my message here, I don’t have to condone or support behaviors that are in violation of God’s law, I will not do that, but I can love you and show you kindness because that is what God does for me daily.
God is the creator and Jesus died for every single one of us on this planet. It is through his blood that we can have salvation.

So, that made me think again as to why there is this push and desire to segregate ourselves. Who benefits from division and segregation? It certainly isn’t me or anyone else that I know.
Hear me out, we aren’t going to agree on everything, because all of us come from different backgrounds and experiences. In my case, my Christian faith supersedes every man made philosophy or belief system because it is imperfect and very likely against God’s will for my life.
Let me be clear here, if we have disagreements on certain topics, I can assure you, it will not be based on the color of your skin. God has already addressed this in Acts 17:26 and Romans 2:11& 12.
Besides, I have too many friends that look nothing like me, that have been by my side many times when I needed them. If we can’t get past all of this color/race nonsense of one race being superior/ inferior to another then we are absolutely doomed as a nation.

It is my prayer that we can one day have in our hearts to be united as Americans instead of unhappy, warring tribes.

In Christ,
AngelaChristine ❤️

Faith, Family, Mindset, Parenting, Reflections, Sadness

Tears Come Sometimes

I sat in my van this afternoon and cried real tears. Not because of one thing or someone, but because I’ve been carrying weight that for most people would be too hard to carry. Sure, people admire me for what I do, they give me praise and pats on the back. In fact, just today a friend called me her hero. I don’t feel like anyone’s hero. Yesterday, another friend said something similar.

Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate being noticed and admired. But there are just times when I wish I could just hand off some of my responsibilities to someone else, not forever, but at least for a little while.

Perhaps my heart is a little heavier, because while speaking to a dear sister in Christ yesterday, I had to acknowledge that I have no plan B. It’s just God, me and my kids. I mean, if anything were to happen to me, I literally have no one in this world that I could leave my children with. This last year has taught me that. Maybe that is why the tears appeared and wouldn’t stop flowing. Even as I type this post, I feel a little teary eyed.

Life is funny in that way. At some point, you have to face the truth; our lives are truly a vapor and just like that can be gone.

So, when people ask me why I push myself so hard to build my health and wellness business, that’s easy, two words, Emily and Ethan. It is my plan ABCDEF and G. There is no greater industry than this one. It’s very foundation is love and service. God is the owner and I am merely his steward.

While I don’t always appreciate this journey, I thank God that he chose me. I thank him because he saw me and decided that I was worth saving even when I didn’t see myself as worth the trouble.

Today, was not one of my finest days, but it is far from being the worst. And if the Lord wills it, tomorrow will be another opportunity to grow closer to him and to improve upon what I got right today.

I will not give up and I will not fail. Emily and Ethan need me and I need them too.

With love,

AngelaChristine

Belief, Faith, Family, Love, Mindset, Parenting, Reflections

This Is Too Hard

The past two weeks have been extra tough. The fatigue that plagued me for several years came back a couple of weeks ago and hasn’t relented until today. Just to give a little context, I was diagnosed with Hashimoto’s on August 1, 2018, which was exactly one month before my husband at the time texted me to let me know that essentially our marriage was done. In spite of that, I have been able to manage it without medication. However, yesterday was the first time, I have ever considered going on medication due to level of exhaustion that I have been feeling.

I don’t recall there being a specific event or activity that happened that would have thrown me off, or caused me to feel this down, but something did happen to remind me that I am not invincible and I shouldn’t expect to do it all. Which sounds completely insane to me, when I have to do it all, because there is no one else to do what I do. Or perhaps, I’m expecting more than I should. Perhaps, it should be simpler.

This is the trick about growth, sometimes when you make the decision to elevate your life, you sometimes have to tap into areas that you may not want to tap into. When I started working with my Business Leadership Coach, I knew that I would have to tackle mindset and vision, but to go to places that I had never prepared to visit has been harder than I thought it would be.

I believe that I am in the land of limiting beliefs and instead of confronting those beliefs, I have allowed my brain to use the avoidance key, so that I don’t have to tackle what I know to be true and that awareness has manifested itself in the physical of overwhelming fatigue.

An overwhelming fatigue that was finally helped by my taking a walk with my daughter this afternoon. While I chatting with her, I realized that in order for her to do the hard stuff, I have to model it for her. When my mind wants to give me the option of avoidance, I have to conscientiously say no, otherwise nothing changes and my daughter will not understand the meaning of sticking with it, even when you think that you can’t.

While I still have more mind clearing to do, I am keenly aware of the eyes that are watching me. While I may get worn from time to time, it’s okay to allow my children the opportunity to see that I am fallible and that I am still learning too. I am learning to walk closer to Jesus and to leave my burdens with him. I am building my confidence by adjusting my habits and my expectations. I am giving myself grace when I fall a bit short and I have accepted that breaks are necessary to prevent the overwhelm and burnout.

My journey has only just begun and I will arrive where I am meant to be at precisely the right time.

With grace,

AngelaChristine

American, Current Events, Freedom, Mindset, Reflections

I Will Not Remain Silent

Shattered

When Covid 19 first hit the United States, I played along because I knew that people were scared (not with a mask though) and I didn’t want to seem insensitive. But seeing how this is coming up on a year, I will not hold my tongue any longer. I just can’t, because I am truly concerned for our country. I am sincerely concerned that my children will have no concept of what freedom and liberty actually looks like. I have no secret or nefarious agenda, I just want to live the life that God placed me here to live and that does not include prolonged mask wearing, social distancing and staying in my home for extended periods of time.

So here is the deal, I have a brain, I know what is in the best interest of my own body. I know how medications work, I’ve spent the past 23 years of my life monitoring or managing clinical trials and I’m now in school training to become a Functional Nutrition Counselor, so that being said, until the Government can adequately address the following issues, I’ll take its health recommendations with a grain of salt.

-Why is the US ranked 46th in longevity?
-Why is medical error the third leading cause of death in the US? Killing over 250,000 a year?
-Why is child mortality in the US worse among the 20 wealthiest countries?
-Why is the US ranked 68th in first day newborn deaths?
-Why does America pop more pills than any other country?
-Why have autoimmune disorders and neurological disorders skyrocketed in the last 30 years?

Last point, governments were instituted by men to protect the rights endowed to us by our Creator. If at anytime the government operates outside of those parameters, we are morally obligated not to comply. By the way, if you’ve never studied the atrocities of WWII, you might want to go and do a little research. The propaganda being used on the American people is eerily similar.

Living in freedom,

AngelaChristine

Faith, Love, Mindset, Reflections

I Cannot Sit in that Space

I love you, but I can’t sit in that space with you. My days are much too full with work, homeschooling, transporting to this therapy and to that one. Never having more than ten minutes to myself, to think or process. No, that space is much too confining for me.

You see, I have a special needs kid who also happens to have seizures, primarily controlled by medicine, but there have been times when they were not. I’ve ridden ambulances too many times to count. I’ve spent days, a week or two in the hospital after an uncontrolled seizure. So I know fear, I have faced it head on and no, that is why, I cannot sit or be in that space with you.

I know the media has you all up in arms over this virus. Pump the fear, control behavior. It’s a perfect strategy, if you ask me. Ratchet it up enough and motives are never questioned. And right when you think, they may be losing their grip, they up the fear again. The cycle is endless. But I still won’t sit in that space with you.

I had to bury my mother, my best friend, while pregnant with my first child, my daughter. I watched my precious son have a full blown seizure at my dad’s wedding, which I never got to see because I was headed to the hospital in one of the first of many ambulance rides. I was cast aside by my then husband in the midst of my own medical crisis. So you see, I cannot sit in that space of fear.

Fear is a weapon, that is used to control and limit. It’s too overwhelming, it makes me feel even more isolated and alone. So it is not something, I will embrace. The Bible says, “for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.” 2 Timothy 1:7. Those are the qualities that this world needs now more than ever.

While it may be easy to sit in my home and listen to the news and entertain the doom and gloom, I will instead choose faith, love and hope because I do love you and I know that when fear is present, I cannot sit in that space.

With more love,

AngelaChristine

Faith, Mindset, Reflections

When Life Changes Your Plans

I am sometimes asked why now, why network marketing? “Why would you give up your career in the pharmaceutical industry for something that is um well, uncertain?”
The answer is simple, two words, Emily and Ethan. I have spent their entire lives as a part time mother, never fully engaged or all in because there is always one thing or another pulling for my attention. The biggest being my job. Even now as a single working mother, it is abundantly clear that what they need most is me. An all in mother to make things feel somewhat normal.

Yes, I know what you’ll say, “they just have to understand you have to work.” But do they? They are children, they are living through their parents divorce and the parent they are with all the time, just doesn’t have time.

I only get one life to live and working to build someone else’s dream is not what I would call, life to the full ( not knocking anyone for their choice). Our lives are so much more. God called me to be a mother, to nurture and to guide my children back to Him. How is that even possible to do when everyday is an exercise in tug of war?

I get that everyone has choices to make, and my choices may not be your cup of tea. That’s cool. What most people don’t know or understand is I live on constant alert. I never know when my son might have a seizure or get sick. There is no pause, rewind or replay. This is my life. Not complaining, very grateful to work from home, but when these episodes occur, work stops. Other activities full stop.

I guess I am writing all of this to say, that everyone has their “why” for joining network marketing and as varied as their reasons may be the common denominator is people just want time freedom and financial freedom. No job will ever give you that. This is not a hobby or a side hustle for me. It is a lifestyle. I am a Christian Entrepreneur growing a future for myself and my children and I am not going to apologize for that.

With joyful intentions!

AngelaChristine

Want to improve your gut health? Ask me about Triplex or check out my website. http://www.plexusworldwide.com/believeandhope